an actual realization of reality

I think of this blog like an old friend - we can just pick up where we left off and every thing is swell. I missed you, you missed me, it's all good.

Let's get going.

So I meet with a few of my Christ-loving brothers every week for some truthful discussion of what it looks like to love the Lord in your head, in your heart, with your job, with your family and friends, with strangers, and with your time.

This past week was especially powerful. I pose this thought on this blog because I believe it to be a pivotal thought that should change the way I do everything. It will serve to either drive me into my Father's arms who I dearly love or it will expose the fraud that the world has all the right to expect of Christians who keep the truth to themselves. Here goes...

What if I lived my life as if the Holy Spirit (because He is) were right next to me?

Let me go deeper. What if I actually visualized Him next to me in all situations? He is there. Actually there, right? We agree upon that, right? (If you don't please call me - 817 781-3576 and let's have lunch sometime - seriously call me) Ok, so if we agree, then why do I treat Him as though He doesn't. Try it right now with me. (because He's right there). Try it. Visualize Him sitting right next to you.

Now hold on to that visualization that actually exists for the entire day. Keep visualizing Him there. Seeing what you see. Hearing what you hear. Knowing what you know.

Ok. So now know that He craves to speak to you because it's awkward to sit next to someone and not speak to them. I've been on flights with folks who don't want to merely converse and it gets very uncomfortable after merely a few hours. Just imagine what it is like to go the whole day and nothing. The silent treatment. It's quite rude actually, isn't it?

Ok. Now my thought goes to the fact that since He is right here with me constantly then what does He want? Let's flesh this out a bit. He is my everything. I am filled with joy because I know Him and even more so because He has made the sacrifice to know me. So let me think. I spend the majority of my time with my wife Larissa. She is my best friend. When possible she goes everywhere with me. She makes me look really good. She's nicer than me. She's smarter than me. She's, well, let's just end it with she's awesome! We actually have a running gag that is played upon us as a couple. When we go to restaurants, the waiters often assume that I am not with her or that I'm "just a friend". They'll even offer to split the check two ways. Yeah, it's happened. Their clear shock that I have a wife as lovely as she is truly bewilders them. I think its awesome and I love to say "This is my wife. She married me."

I want people to meet her because she is awesome. She literally gives me credibility that I'm not a goof and that I might actual have some substance to my character (because clearly I didn't nab her with my stunning good looks or my bank account). And besides that, she's standing right there next to me when I meet these people. It would be rude and insane not to introduce her because she's standing right next to me. She makes me interesting.

Ok. So let's apply that same thought to the Holy Spirit who is right next to me right now. He makes me interesting. He rescued me. He brought me out of death and into life eternal. Think about that for a second. Have you ever been walking down the hall at your office and someone you know stops and asks you "How are you?". If you're anything like me, you turn and casually proclaim "Pretty good."

Think of it this way and imagine this scene if you will. Your fourth floor apartment is on fire. A massive fire. There's no way out except out the window and you can't fly. You're going to die. Then all of a sudden a firefighter comes barreling in through the window. He gets 3rd degree burns on his face and is badly disfigured but he rescues you nonetheless counting his own well-being as secondary.

Now the scene changes and you're having your birthday party of which you've invited the firefighter who saved you. You've become close since he rescued you. So you grab a soda from the fridge and your mingling. You and your firefighter friend are standing there side by side when your neighbor from across the street comes up and asks "Hey how ya doing?" and you answer "Ah, pretty good."

Is that an appropriate response? Shouldn't the response be "Man, I'm great because of this fella right here! Ya see my apartment was on fire and he came and bolted through the window and he was on fire and it was really scary but he was calm and steady as a rock, he grabbed me up and rescued me without a scratch. I shouldn't even be having this birthday right now. I should be dead but because of this guy, man, I'm without a scar because of this man right here! He's my hero! Have I introduced you guys yet?" Shouldn't that be the response. Isn't that the natural response?

The Holy Spirit is right next to me. I am overjoyed that He rescued me. I shouldn't be here right now but because of Him, man, I'm without a scar because of Him! He's my hero!!! Have I introduced you yet?

My prayer is that I can constantly be made to realize the reality of the Holy Spirit dwelling with me. He is right next to me. How will this realization change how I do things? How I handle stress? How I handle the quiet? The conversations I have? This is going to change everything. Praise HIM!!!!

reasons (excuses)

I've been contemplating leaving my job at AT&T for a while now to pursue my own company full time and it has finally come to pass. God has blessed my family once again with not only the chance to start a new full time career but to leave with some coin to sustain in our pockets. So Friday May 1st will be my last day at my current job and will begin my career as a full time entrepreneur.

As you might imagine we've been in heavy prayer about this decision. My wife Larissa, as always, has been a rock for me. Consistently believing that God is going to do great things.
I've been referring to the job change as "a leap of faith". That coined phrase encompasses much more than just my change in career though. For the past four years I've used my two jobs as an excuse as to why I haven't fully sunk myself into ministry. My "schedule" just wouldn't permit or so I'd reason. So now as my job count is cut in half, I'm excited about sinking. As I sit to write this entry, I can visualize all the things I want to do with that extra time from having longer more devoted quiet prayertime to playing in the band at church to witnessing to others. The list goes on and on ranging from miniscule goals to grandiose dreams.

But I am no stranger to myself. I've been with me from the very start. I know my heart. I know that often my desire to do my Lord's work is very real but it more than often never comes to fruition. Perhaps I should take a few college courses studying biology. My first question would be...what is the name of the organ that acts as a barracade between my heart and my hands, feet and mouth? I don't know the name for it but it seems to be the most active organ in my body. Why is it that I can sit here and write out missionary goals for myself but the most action they see remains on the keyboard? Excuses abound in my life. I masquerade them as "reasons". I'm trying to truly examine the usage of those two words in my life. They are not synonymous!! I use the word "reason" as a tool to hide shame. I'm tired of making excuses my reason for not doing my Father's work.

When I made less money, I told myself "if I only had a few more dollars". When I was single, "if I only had a wife." When I had two jobs, "if I only had more time." When I didn't have anymore excuses, "if I only had a good reason." There is no good reason! Read Luke 14:15-23 when Jesus told the parable of the great banquet. My Lord is very clear about what He thinks about excuses.

Please hold me accountable. I long to feast at the banquet.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]

our intentions

"Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold -- but so does a hard-boiled egg."

Let me start by saying that I absolutely love this day. Easter is the accumulation of what God desired for us all along. And I worship Him for this perfect day that we celebrate! It is a joyous celebration with our family and the body of Christ. It's a day full of good eats and photo-ops! Easter Sunday morning has always been, at least in the South, a day that the ladies can wear their beautiful dresses, the gentlemen their finely pressed suits and the little baby girls their lace-trimmed bonnets. (My baby girl looked especially sweet in hers!) Even I got in on the action this morning and broke out my sweater vest/necktie combo! Everyone has, indeed, shown up to worship our Lord in their very best with every detail raked over with a fine-toothed comb. And their efforts have paid off - everyone looks absolutely stunning!

But as I get settled in after a great day of worship and ham-mashed tater-roll sandwiches, I loosen my tie and and think to myself, why isn't every day like Easter Sunday morning? No I don't want to get all gussied up every day - I don't have that many sweater vests! What I mean to say is, shouldn't we go over our lives with a fine-toothed comb? Shouldn't we strive to present our very best to our Lord and Savior every moment of the day?

While the lunch ladies at Luby's might be easily fooled by our outward pin-stripped appearance, our God is certainly not. He sees us for how we are. While many might show up to Sunday worship in an Armani suit, God sees their lives the rest of the week. And sadly, I believe that for many of us, He sees our lives and we're clothed in mere rags. I think that we dress our lives up thinking that the Creator will look down from Heaven and be fooled. Our suits consists of going to church every Sunday, volunteering to say grace at an afternoon luncheon, not drinking, smoking, cursing, or hanging out with folks that do, wearing t-shirts that are cleverly Christian, and, lastly, just "living a good life". To me those things seem to be footy pajamas, simple deeds we put on as toddlers in the faith. So often, though, we become perfectly suited to our meager attempt to appear holy. But that is not holiness nor is God impressed. Why do we wait to be patted on our heads for things that we don't do or for doing things that we enjoy?

Everyone's intention on Easter Sunday morning is to show up looking prestine and to impress those around them. We're looking for others to look at us and say "Wow you look great!" And while that is perfectly nice, shouldn't we be more concerned how God sees us. While I might show up in my dandiest suit, most of the time I'm dressed in blue jeans and a wrinkled shirt. My day to day dress does not coincide with my Sunday morn attire. My intention is to look debonaire and suave, but on the other side of noon I'm neither of those things. I think that quite often my spiritual life is a lot like this as well. I wake up fired up to do God's work but when I arrive to face the day the reality of a coward's life presents itself. An unfaithful soldier comes marching in. Sure....I'm dressed the part....ready to serve in battle but when the time is ready, I stand at ease.

I'm ready to stop only appearing to be a Christian and start putting my life where my mouth is. Christ took my place on the cross. I deserve to be the one being beaten across my back and to be nailed to a tree. My clothes should be blood stained but because of Him, my God sees me washed white as snow. So with that I pray to be done with this former life. Clearly, by the grace of God, I'm not suited for a life as a poser.

the before

So the immediate question is..."what does the Holy Bible say about what makes a man (or woman) a disciple?"

To get started here's a quick rundown of what is the heart of a disciple...and how I stack up. This was quite the kick in the rear!

1. A disciple must have assurance of salvation. Ok so I definitely have number one checked! My Father proves to me each day that I have been rescued. I have died to myself and have been born again to my new life in Jesus Christ.
   

2. A disciple walks in the fullness and power of the Holy Spirit. It's the word "fullness" that I cannot confess to.

3. A disciple demonstrates love for God, his neighbor, his fellow disciples, and his enemies. I think that to some they definitely feel the outpour of love that my Father has placed upon my heart but to others I cloud it with sarcasm and casualness.

4. A disciple is one who knows how to read, study, memorize, and meditate upon the Word of God, to hide its truths in his heart. Oh man, this one is a real kidney punch! This is one that needs the prayers of those around me. Memorizing scripture has never been a discipline of mine. I usually read for overall content but having the words of my Father right on the tip of my tongue at all times sounds joyful!

5. A true disciple of Jesus is a man of prayer. Better than I used to be, but still miles and miles away from where I should be.

6. The disciple is one who is obedient, who studies the Word of God, and obeys the commands of God in a lifestyle that honors the Lord Jesus Christ. I wish I could check yes to all of the above but I cannot. That's sort of the point behind this journey!
   

7. A disciple is one who trusts God and lives a life of faith. At first glance, I would say yes, but then why do I do so little. Why do I talk myself out of daily witnessing to others if I truly trust Him? Why do I side more with my image and reputation than with the tugging of the Holy Spirit? So I guess the answer is no.
   

8. A disciple understands God's grace. Is this really only the second time I've been able to check something off my list? Yes, yes, yes. Everyday. Every hour. That's why I'm fed up with it all. He does so much for me and I deserve nothing yet I do nothing for Him and He deserves everything!
   

9. A disciple is one who witnesses for Christ as a way of life. Not as a way of life though this is my desire for sure. I'm just a coward many times.
   

10. A true disciple of the Lord Jesus worships God in the fellowship of his church. Sundays mostly....like every other.

So that's where I stand at the beginning of my journey. Where to start?

the intent

Stand firm therefore, HAVING GIRDED YOUR LOINS WITH TRUTH, and HAVING PUT ON THE BREASTPLATE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS, and having SHOD YOUR FEET WITH THE PREPARATION OF THE GOSPEL OF PEACE; in addition to all, taking up the SHIELD OF FAITH with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take THE HELMET OF SALVATION, and THE SWORD OF THE SPIRIT, which is the word of God.

- Ephesians 6:14-17

I've typed and deleted the start to this initial post a dozen times or so trying to find the exact right words to capture what its' intent is. I sort of wish I had one of those old school typewriters so I could look behind me to find a pile of balled-up paper strewn across my office floor. After many failed attempts here it is...

This is a blog, but hopefully it will turn into much more than that. I pray that it will be a new accountability partner, an encouragement both to myself and to those who read it, a ruler to measure my spiritual growth, a resource for others growing in their walk, a journey to show my children one day, and above all, a testament to my desire to glorify my Lord and Savior, Christ Jesus, who first loved me.
The idea behind Live Like One! is to put my heart and words into action. The past ten years of my life, I've lived my life as a "casual" Christian. I've gone through the Gospel with maybe a dozen people, bought a Bible for maybe a handful, and less for other fruits that a disciple of Christ should be active in doing. There are so many in the world who haven't heard the good news of Jesus Christ. I must tell them before it's too late!

So there it is. The gauntlet has been thrown down for myself. This is not a blog for me to preach to you, but yet a process in learning to become a real-life disciple of Jesus Christ. Please begin to pray for me....